Humor

[Cruncher Pete]

One time I went to camp and we were warned not to tell dirty jokes at the fun night. I was encouraged to do so by my mentor. The jokes went something like this...Why did Ronald McDonald get in legal trouble? He tried to stuff his big mac into a small fry. The other I think wasWhy do gays like hamburgers? It is hot meat between two buns.Those jokes as funny as they were still got me cancelled at camp many years ago

[Cruncher Pete]

A man is riding through the desert on a horse. He comes across a dog dragging himself through the sand.The dog notices them and calls out "Oh help me, please! I've been lost in this desert for days and I'm dying of thirst! Please, help me!"The man leaps off his horse, pulls out his canteen and rushes to the dog. He pours water into a cup and offers it to him, who begins to quickly lap it up and saying "Oh God bless you, sir! You saved my life!"As the dog drinks, the man thinks this over, saying "I didn't know dogs could talk."The horse says "Yeah, me either..."

[Cruncher Pete]

I was on a flight with a very cheerful flight attendant, who was clearly gay and made everyone smile as he served us food and drinks.As we were getting ready to land, he came down the aisle in a fun way and announced, "Captain Marvey asked me to tell you that he'll be landing the big, scary plane soon. So, lovely people, please put your trays up – that would be super."As he walked back down the aisle, he saw a well-dressed woman, who looked a bit Arabic, hadn't moved her tray. He said, "Maybe you didn't hear me over the loud engines, but I asked you to raise your trazy-poo so the main man can get us safely on the ground."The woman calmly turned to him and said, "In my country, I'm called a Princess and I don't take orders from anyone."Without missing a beat, the flight attendant replied, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray up, Bitch."